Tuesday, December 13, 2005

And They All Lived Happily Ever After

Leaving the theater last week, having just seen the so-much-better-than-I-thought-it-would-be Pride and Prejudice, I felt a sense of loss. Searching my feelings over hot chocolate later that night, I came upon the reason. The movie's ending had robbed me of one of my (many) compulsions: continuing a movie or play in my head long after it is over.

I can't remember when this habit first began, but I suspect its roots are deep. In fact, my earliest post-scripting tendencies may have begun with Disney's Cinderella. He puts on the slipper, and that's it? What about the sewing mice? Did she bring them to the castle with her? Did the fairy godmother come for Sunday brunches? Did she ever change her dress? I needed completion. Or at least extension.

Sometimes, when a film ends sadly, I try to help the characters move past that tragic ending to a more hopeful future. I haven't had much luck with some (Romeo and Juliet - not much can be done there), but for a few I think I've really been able to make a difference. (Scarlett O'Hara had ISSUES, but tomorrow eventually was another day.)

So, when Lizzy kissed Mr. Darcy's hand, I was content. The movie would end, and I would leave the theater in a romantic haze, envisioning the joy Elizabeth would feel as she fell asleep that night, safe and secure in Darcy's love.

Except it didn't end. It continued, and I left the theater entirely unsatisfied. Ah, well. I'm sure Cinderella is in need of a new dress or two.


Kiki said...

Like, Lydia crawls home months later, battered and bruised, after she's had ENOUGH of Wickham's childish rages. (By the way, they really showed his evil side in that film when he forcefully pulled Lydia down in the carriage as she's waving good-bye to her family. I mean, DANG!) Her father turns her at the door with a, "You've made your bed, silly girl!"

Bingley's sister ends up married to a man who is even snobbier than she, and he can't stand her.

c jane said...

Mrs. Darcy eventually got a boob job.
(That is what I imagined happened.)
With all that money and her flat chest and all...

Kiki said...

She also got some braces and headgear to help remedy that annoyingly awful underbite.

c jane said...

Carrie. I thought I was the only one who noticed. I love you.

Kiki said...

You know, when I first saw that this adaptation of Pride and Prejudice was being made, I didn't think, "I'm going to hate this show," because nothing could stand up next to A&E's version, I thought that because I knew Keira's underbite was going to bother me the whole time.

cotton_in_the_medicine_bottles said...

I have yet to see it--partially because could anyone be yummier than Colin Firth?
However, I just want you buxom ladies to know that men do occassionally fall in love with women with small breasts! Geez!

c jane said...

Hillary, if you are referring to yourself, well, I saw you yesterday and girlfriend you don't have that problem.

AzĂșcar said...


I think my proclivity to post-story imaginings really began with Calico Captive. I was SO ANGRY that she gave up life in fabulous Montreal with parties and dresses and dashing men, and returned to BFE backwoods Conn. I decided to imagine that she'd gone back to the fancy quebecois trapper and lived a glittering life full of panniers and powdered wigs.

cotton_in_the_medicine_bottles said...

Well CJane, I am currently nursing. And that adds about a size.
When I ran a 10K, I looked like a 10 year old. It's so great that I lose all my weight there first because I'd really hate to be bothered by pesky boobs.

Carolyn said...

You would have been happy if you had seen it in London.

According to an article in the Deseret Morning News (11/25/2005), test audiences in the U.S. loved the kiss at the end, but the British hated it. So the final scene wasn't included in the version that plays in the U.K. and Europe. To read the article, go here:

So, maybe you should see it again, pretend you are in London, and walk out after Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth talk to Mr. Bennett. I recommend a 2nd viewing in any case.

--from Sarah's sister

(You and Sarah sang an Indigo Girls song at my ex-sister-in-law's
wedding; my soon-to-be-husband played the guitar. Sarah told me to
read your blog if I ever needed a break. Thanks for giving me a reason to smile on multiple occasions.)

Emmie said...

Of course I remember you! And I remember that your husband is one heckuva guitar player. I'm so flattered that you read my blog. Thank you, too, for the article - it confirms what I've always suspected: I need to live in London!

Anonymous said...

You've sung an Indigo Girls song? Stu, were you aware of this?

AzĂșcar said...

Dear Emmie,
Blog more.
Your friend,